“Do they believe it or not?”
We ask that question of many a grifter, politician, preacher, media personality, and probably more people close to us than we’d like. Is the bullshit and paranoia coming out of their mouths real, or are they basically making it up and lying? We’d like to know so we can be upset with them properly, and in a few cases get the hell away or alert people.
It’s easy to see this as a binary. People believe or they don’t, with some but not significant wiggle room. It’s more or less truth or lying, right? However I’d like to suggest we’re missing a larger scale – maybe some people we deal with (the grifters and conspiracy theorists and the like) believe differently than a simple binary that probably applies to the majority of people.
Some people don’t have beliefs, but a narrative they’re eternally juggling to keep up, often for reasons that are, well, grifty and self-serving. We all have narratives, but these people are the narrative with far less person in there.
. . . I’d better explain.
I’m a fan of the podcast Knowledge Fight, where two sort-of-former comedians analyze infamous conspiracy theorist/grifter/harasser Alex Jones. As the two hosts, Dan and Jordan, are performers they bring a unique understanding to people like Jones. Being a kind of whatever-works bottom feeder who rose to the top, Jones is an excellent case study of people like him.
In one episode, Dan realized that Jones’ various interviews, comments, etc. were not really engaging people. They were self-soothing internal narratives that were externalized, ever seeking to deal with the chaotic mess inside his head. Jones is clearly an insecure person raised on conspiracy theories, eternally in a media bubble since his youth. His “human” interactions were just him constantly stating, validating, and reinforcing the juggling act that was inside his brain – that of a tale where he was the hero.
The comment by Dan stuck with me, and I brought that “is this internal narrative” to listening to Jones and other people of his ilk. Though I’m sure I brought my own biases, many sounded like that. Self-aggrandizing stories, weird insertions of extra data to keep up their mental frameworks, constant pushing for viewpoints to be confirmed. People who constantly sought a kind of self-validation writ as a grander narrative of conspiracy and religion and technology or whatever.
They did not believe anything. They were just trying to keep their story straight, the story where they were always right and good – and made a lot of money and were famous and sold merch. It wasn’t a belief or a lack of belief, it was juggling the tale.
Also I noticed how painful these people seemed inside. There was something to their narratives that were empty, no one was really home, they just had the tales. There was neediness, emptiness, craving, and below that a weird raging anger that didn’t have a point. It was like they were angry for all the bad things they might feel.
(And yes, this recalls a kind of Hungry Ghost).
So no, some people don’t believe or disbelieve. They’re just weaving a story because that’s all they have. They don’t even have the solidity of lying to count on.
-Xenofact