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Speculation on Spiritual Ferment

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As you probably realize, I like doing zines. Chances are you’re reading this in a zine, have some of my zines, or will have my pitch you buying some. I like writing down my spiritual and related thoughts and hearing what people have to say.

Also they make a great gift! Hint.

Anyway as I’ve noted before I’d like to see more spiritual/mystical zines, especially ones about meditation and techniques for self-refinement. I mean yes there are great books, there’s a reason I own so much of the late Thomas Cleary’s translations, but there’s “several thousand years old” and “recent insights.”

This led me to an interesting speculation I’d like to share. I wonder if the current concept of publishing – that you should put out big honking books – is a disservice to “spiritual ferment.” Let me just get to the base of my thoughts.

Imagine spiritual exchanges via zines or some similar reusable, but focused small press. Be it an APA or a quarterly, the goal would be to both record findings, discuss, and dialogue. A bit like the old APAs as I’ve written about before. Such a situation would provide both well-designed and well-thought out written communication and an exchange of ideas.

Large, published works aren’t dialogues and people need dialogue to learn. Large, published works also have the problem of authority wearing you might take them too seriously – even if the author doesn’t intend that. Also maybe I don’t want to go through 250 pages to get 50 pages relevant to me – no offense.

Meanwhile, immediate dialogue is great, but sometimes constant immediate feedback has its own problems. It can be distracting or go off the rails. It can lead to groupthink. Also scheduling time to exchange ideas can be frustrating, and constant use of things like chat programs can be time-sucking in their own way.

But small pieces of work, focused, contemplated, in one’s own time but with a cadence of exchange? I intuitively feel there really is something there.

I’m probably influenced by old Taoist tales of people exchanging small books, papers, poetry, manuals, and so on. But maybe there’s something there to emulate.

Also sometimes the Taoists got wasted together and wrote really sarcastic poetry, but that’s thoughts for another post . . .

The Sage Trap

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Ever see someone who wrote a great book of wisdom and gave a few good speeches change into something not them?  Maybe they become some ranting crank, maybe they’re churning out shit, but they’re not the person you thought they were.  I mean sure maybe they were always an asshole, but not every wise person you admire can be a horrible twit.

What the hell happens to these truly people that make their fifth book so full of bullshit, egotism, crank rants, or all three?  Let me propose that in too many cases the issue is they keep going.

Some people have one to a few good books in them and that’s fine.  I mean no one is angry that Lao-Tzu wrote one (OK, maybe two) books.   I’ve seen many authors who do one or two books of advice and happily go back to whatever they do or write something different.

But we all know many an writer that keeps going. It seems that timeless wisdom becomes less wise and more time consuming as more and more books come out.

In our world, being a truly wise person, being a person of insight, means you will get exploited and be encouraged to exploit yourself.  It can be overwhelming enough that an asshole will go for it, and a truly insightful person may not be insightful enough to fall into the trap.

Our capitalist economy is based on finding what makes money and squeezing the hell out of it.  You’ll get book deals and opportunities, speaking engagements and convention schedules.  Why it might even let you quit that job and be a wise person full time – and then you’re trapped as all you can do is keep doing more stuff even if there’s nothing more to say.

You might even say I’m not doing it for the money.  But you may well bloody be doing it for the praise, the adoration, and the confirmation.  You have confirmation people want you, which can boost your ego or worse make you think you can keep helping people by doing the same thing.  Meanwhile the publishers and marketers will be fine to add to their bank accounts thanks to you.

People don’t want you to go anyway!  You wrote one good book that changed their lives, so keep changing it!  Our culture doesn’t emphasize reading and rereading classics, it pushes the new, the latest, the better-than-last.

What our society does not do is say “you left us some truly great wisdom with this book or two, thank you” and move on – and lets the writer move on.  We damn well know one person can change the world with a book or two, but our culture and economy doesn’t let that happen.

Being someone with real wisdom to share can be a trap.

Again I’m not decrying writing a lot of stuff.  I myself write here and under other names on many subjects because its my hobby – though I did have to learn when to stop.  Other people have a lot to say about subjects – something I also do (and also had to learn when to stop).  Yet others savor the challenge of covering a new topic each book, as a friend of mine does.   What I am saying is it’s best to be aware that our culture and economy will wring every dollar out of you, lock you into doing the same thing, and you may well fall for it.

You can be good enough that you eventually end up not good at all.

I start appreciating many a mystic, monk, and weirdo who wrote a book or two, blew people’s minds, then headed into the mountains or started a band or retired to smoke weed.  Sometimes the greatest gift is to shut up and do something else and let people appreciate your brilliance.

– Xenofact

The Challenge of Sharing the Mystical

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I’ve written here about my thoughts and opinions on the mystical – religion, magick, and the like.  What I haven’t done is share experiences I’ve had.  As you can surmise, I’ve had them, and had ones that stood up after examination – I just don’t like sharing them.

I wanted to explore why, and the hope that it provokes dialogue, dear reader – with you and with myself.

First, such mystic experiences are to an extent personal. They’re intimate things involving gods, personal motivations, and personal insights.  Sharing such things feels, to be honest, rather cringe as people younger than I say.  It’s like blogging about your marriage or when your friend confided their insecurities.

Second, I dislike the idea of sharing mystical experiences as it sounds like bragging – and the esoteric community has no shortage of annoying braggarts and grifters.  I don’t want to show off, I want to share and learn and have a few laughs.

Third, I fear being misinterpreted.  The realm of the mystical is not easy to communicate, and the bullshit out there makes it even more of a challenge.  I’d rather not accidentally lead someone down a painful path, and I’ve made my own mistakes.  Let’s just say I take Quigong much more seriously after what we shall call “an incident.”

Fourth, I sometimes wonder if I can explain mystical things properly.  I have notes on my experiments going back  about 25 years.  But I have to translate them from “me” to “other people and sometimes I’m not sure what I wrote down.

Fifth, let’s face it, all experience is incomplete.  My mystical experiences, even well-explained, might not actually be useful.  That might lead to people misinterpreting as well.

And, finally, I’ve seen plenty of drama among communities of magicians and mystics, and I want no part of it.  This also means I’m pretty bad at finding fellow practitioners, something I hope to remediate – but I don’t blame myself.

So that’s it.  Still, I think I should start sharing some of what I’ve done, and I am seeking appropriate ways to do so.  I will doubtlessly do some here.

Maybe I’ll share some of what happens here – but in a non-cringe way, of course.  I hope.

– Xenofact