Conspirituality

They Believe Differently

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“Do they believe it or not?”

We ask that question of many a grifter, politician, preacher, media personality, and probably more people close to us than we’d like. Is the bullshit and paranoia coming out of their mouths real, or are they basically making it up and lying? We’d like to know so we can be upset with them properly, and in a few cases get the hell away or alert people.

It’s easy to see this as a binary. People believe or they don’t, with some but not significant wiggle room. It’s more or less truth or lying, right? However I’d like to suggest we’re missing a larger scale – maybe some people we deal with (the grifters and conspiracy theorists and the like) believe differently than a simple binary that probably applies to the majority of people.

Some people don’t have beliefs, but a narrative they’re eternally juggling to keep up, often for reasons that are, well, grifty and self-serving. We all have narratives, but these people are the narrative with far less person in there.

. . . I’d better explain.

I’m a fan of the podcast Knowledge Fight, where two sort-of-former comedians analyze infamous conspiracy theorist/grifter/harasser Alex Jones. As the two hosts, Dan and Jordan, are performers they bring a unique understanding to people like Jones. Being a kind of whatever-works bottom feeder who rose to the top, Jones is an excellent case study of people like him.

In one episode, Dan realized that Jones’ various interviews, comments, etc. were not really engaging people. They were self-soothing internal narratives that were externalized, ever seeking to deal with the chaotic mess inside his head. Jones is clearly an insecure person raised on conspiracy theories, eternally in a media bubble since his youth. His “human” interactions were just him constantly stating, validating, and reinforcing the juggling act that was inside his brain – that of a tale where he was the hero.

The comment by Dan stuck with me, and I brought that “is this internal narrative” to listening to Jones and other people of his ilk. Though I’m sure I brought my own biases, many sounded like that. Self-aggrandizing stories, weird insertions of extra data to keep up their mental frameworks, constant pushing for viewpoints to be confirmed. People who constantly sought a kind of self-validation writ as a grander narrative of conspiracy and religion and technology or whatever.

They did not believe anything. They were just trying to keep their story straight, the story where they were always right and good – and made a lot of money and were famous and sold merch. It wasn’t a belief or a lack of belief, it was juggling the tale.

Also I noticed how painful these people seemed inside. There was something to their narratives that were empty, no one was really home, they just had the tales. There was neediness, emptiness, craving, and below that a weird raging anger that didn’t have a point. It was like they were angry for all the bad things they might feel.

(And yes, this recalls a kind of Hungry Ghost).

So no, some people don’t believe or disbelieve. They’re just weaving a story because that’s all they have. They don’t even have the solidity of lying to count on.

-Xenofact

So Where’s The Spirituality?

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It seems a lot of people want to tell me and my friends how to live, act, love, etc. all in the name of their “god.”

They have lists of things to do and don’t do. They have rules. These are all things we have to follow – though it seems certain people get to make exceptions. Usually those shouting the loudest about “divine” guidance seem to get to follow none of it.

They have opinions of who can do what. Often around gender, sometimes age, and in the end skin color and ethnicity. Oh they’ll deny the latter, but it’s fairly obvious their little checklists of who is exceptional is pretty small – and funny thing is all the religious shouters are in that small group.

Know what I don’t see in these religious authoritarians? Any kind of spirituality.

Where’s the soul-shattering insights that lay you humbly low? Where’s the connection of some universal truth that comes through from elsewhere into your mind and words? Where’s the depth of it all, of that great sea of being behind things? Be it god, archetype or insight, these religious checklist-wielders don’t have it.

There’s nothing because all they have is their pile of rules (that of course they don’t have to follow). It’s clear as desert-noon day that there’s nothing spiritual at all, nothing deep, in their minds. There’s just the rage-fueled clockwork click-clack chatter of their demands we conform.

Sure some of them make it up. They fake speaking in tongues, they get ghostwritten books, they have some media consultants. A few are wacked-out enough to think they’re having visions, but then you hear about portals to hell over landmarks and other recycled internet conspiracy theories.

And, in the end, there’s nothing there.

I’ve said that I don’t have to take religious fanatics seriously. I don’t believe in their religion, and as they’re obvious hypocrites I don’t have to believe them. But let me add to that, in my more esoteric moments, it’s pretty damn clear they have no claim to deep spiritual insights.

They’ve just got a checklist, and obviously an agenda. If they every encountered some moment that cracked their soul open to something bigger, they wouldn’t be such assholes, or they’d crawl away in shame.

-Xenofact

The Monsters They Brought With Them

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There’s something wrong with so many famous people, rich people, and famous rich people. They’re ranting about conspiracy theories and weird reproductive obsessions. There’s talk of aliens and hallucinatory trips, drug usage, and secret history from people supposedly directing our future.. Something is off with these folks.

It’s not just things they say or believe for a profit or fame – I mean they do say these things for profit and fame. But it seems they really believe some of this crap, at least before they find something else to freak out about. There is some real fear there under the usual isolated-rich-famous-weirdo delusions.

It seems weird to be so afraid of everything. I mean you got money and fame and everything, why be so terrified? Why be so terrified of things that are clearly bullshit?

Well beyond daddy issues and the usual problems that make people fall into conspiracy thinking, I think one issue is these people are so isolated.

You’re rich, you can do anything you want. But also you depend on other people, people who say what you want to here so they stay on the gravy train. You are flattered and complimented. You are isolated and detached from reality.

You’re famous. People love you, talk about you, follow you (often for almost no good reason). Of course that means once again you exist in an isolated world. You are of course flattered and complimented, probably even moreso if you were just rich.

If you’re rich, famous, or both you exist in a kind of bubble, separate from reality. You’re in a kind of virtual reality crossed with an isolation tank. There’s no reality, there’s just what you brought with you.

And many people bring monsters with them.

Fears and delusions rampage through their minds, echoing off of the walls of their strange isolation. No one is going to correct them or even help them. That might make them angry and cut off the money train.

Told what they want to hear, they operate in unreality. Reality will shift to what they want to hear, delivered by hangers-on, investors, and an adoring public. But that also means their own terrors and insecurities can find root in their fallow minds. People who want to get ahead may also play off of their concerns.

Most of all, I suspect many of them know this isn’t real. You know people are lying, are flattering you. The news cycle constantly reminds you of your mistakes and fallabilities. You’re out there, famous, rich, exposed to the eye of reality and the eye of yourself. Every day, maybe every minute on social media, someone is reminding you you’re not right, you’re not perfect, you’re just a bank account and a PR department wrapped in flesh.

The rich, the famous in our world are so disconnected I wonder how much of their strange paranoia is just their own bouncing off the walls of their own unreal prison.

Unfortunately they make decisions about our lives.

–Xenofact